Week 9: Oct 27-Nov 3: Live Through This: Pages 91-162
I'm also thinking how closely this second book mirrors some of our realities as art educators: students with issues, adults with issues, low budgets, no respect, etc. This is book that galvanizes many ideas that impact us as teachers, parents, siblings, friends, citizens, etc.
First off. Some images of recycled bottles in my yard. I forgot to post those last week. I try to recycle dish water (grey water-I water outside plants with it), and most of what used to go into my garbage. If I didn't mention this, TTU-Lubbock campus recycles cardboard, plastic, tin, and glass and last year created 31 $1,000 scholarships for students.
Sorry I am posting this so late. I fell out of a pickup bed last weekend during my Heart of Lubbock Neighborhood Cleanup and bruised and sprained the heck out of the right side of my body: arm, fingers, hand. Broke a toe. Have been mostly resting. I'm right-handed--hurts to type.
She's Lost Control Again by Nicole Blackman (pp. 91-104)
Double Trouble in the Love Art Lab by Stephens and Sprinkle (pp. 105-118)
Friends as Heroes by Silas Howard (pp. 119-128)
Rappin' My Wounds by Toni Blackman (pp. 129-140))
The Artful Art fo the Role of Art in the Ugly Art of Survival by DiMassa (pp. 141-148)
Weight Watcher by Stephanie Howell (pp. 149-162)
I noticed that a few years ago I had assigned a short writing assignment for this class mid-way through that I have since stopped doing because we write so much in our posts--the kinds of writing where some of us begin to practice revealing things or pondering heavy things.
Your posts from last week reveal some of your connections to similar issues. Reading this book with all of the personal accounts really exemplifies what first person "I" language is and how it can be used. In the past, I have asked people to read one to three former MAE papers in this class to get an idea of what the end products look like. That will be our third book. I am looking forward to that to see what you think.
The MAE papers (our third book) are examples/models for what is possible and how former MAEs wove together their stories about their art, projects or theses--their personal and professional issues. I wanted you to see what the "end products" looked like. You can see what they wrote on--how they wrote about themselves, etc.
As this semester draws to an end, I am way behind in many things--as usual. Don't panic if you still have not figured out a project. If you are over-stressed and over-extended, over these next two weeks, you may as a strategy read every other article or take one of these two weeks off from the reading the text. We have a Thanksgiving break week. You can catch-up on previous weeks if you need to. Do what you need to do to stay sane. Some of these readings are photo essays and comics. This book offers us a more open and honest way of listening to writers who write what is really important in their lives--note how one uses an alias. What does it mean in our lives that when we talk about what is most important, there are few venues to share?
In terms of projects, if you are stuck, write about being stuck for now. Hopefully this book will help you if you are stuck--widen what is possible in terms of topics. Like in the movie Julie and Julia (2009), you can start a blog, or start to journal ideas--that can be a beginning to a project--all I want is a beginning.
As this semester draws to an end, I am way behind in many things--as usual. Don't panic if you still have not figured out a project. If you are over-stressed and over-extended, over these next two weeks, you may as a strategy read every other article or take one of these two weeks off from the reading the text. We have a Thanksgiving break week. You can catch-up on previous weeks if you need to. Do what you need to do to stay sane. Some of these readings are photo essays and comics. This book offers us a more open and honest way of listening to writers who write what is really important in their lives--note how one uses an alias. What does it mean in our lives that when we talk about what is most important, there are few venues to share?
In terms of projects, if you are stuck, write about being stuck for now. Hopefully this book will help you if you are stuck--widen what is possible in terms of topics. Like in the movie Julie and Julia (2009), you can start a blog, or start to journal ideas--that can be a beginning to a project--all I want is a beginning.
It was April who shared our current book with Future who told me to use it in our research classes years ago. Thanks for that. We are reading autobiographical research--self-stories written by authors. Auto ethnographic writing is more layered as an author will write something, then write about the writing, often analyzing or referring other material or data to it. Anything ethnographic applies to our teaching, our lives, our friends, our moods, our art, etc. Candie and others posted and reminded us that there is hope--and healing when broken. Many of you testified to how broken schools are in not even understanding the importance or places for Art as a subject. We often defend that we are important, etc.
I have a few friends who have told me that when they die, I or others must go into their bedrooms and destroy their journals. And they are adamant about this. As I reread this book, I am reminded of the radical notion of listening--listening as a pedagogical strategy. A radical one. Just to listen. I learned that mainly from female friends throughout my life. I don't have to fix anything. Just be there and listen.
In the past, people have said things about this book: a former MAE identified with emotions and sometimes not the methods. For many this is difficult to read. Many noticed all of the different methods of making research/writing/poetry/art/etc. Some posted about the powerful use of words. A few people posted that they were emotionally drained. These books are powerfully frightening in many ways--stimulating. These autobiographical pieces can be useless or helpful. Focus on ones that stimulate you.
A few people posted that they are struggling with project ideas. You can create a private project that no one else sees AND that even I don't see. Yes, that is an option. If it's that private, I accommodate. You do not have to prove to me that you made something--I will trust that you did.
Journaling is for oneself, so if yours is that private, that's fine with me. If you just want me to see something, that is fine also. Just keep in mind that these are beginnings to something--you do not have to finish. Begin to think about one thing and how you might do it. Your project may be just that--a blueprint for something you might do in the future. NOT NOW. A project could be a journal entry where you journal about being stuck--your fears--anxieties, etc. And that's it. Think simply. Yes, email and re-email me any questions about projects.
A series of posts and images just about thinking about what I learned and still do not know about my body. Two plein air trading card-size watercolors and text about what I never learned about my body--that's a project. Simple. Think of this as notes. A photo essay of me or my friends and what we all did not know about our bodies. Getting the idea--personal always works for me. And remember, sometimes that is not interesting to anyone else but me/us. Another example: a project where you make art with your sister or son or daughter--and the story behind that--that's a projects. Think of this project as a snapshot of something.
Think of background info--What drew it all together. A short story describing an event and maybe a digital image of some art made or their photos--that's a project. Look up Placenotes: Austin or Placentas: West Texas on Amazon. A project can be one photo or digital image and text on another page--or a backside. I was actually thinking of a former student Kim and a recipe card. The recipe is have major surgeries; reconnect with a sibling; make art; have conversations; bond and love each other. It's; that simple.
Please email me if you are struggling. No need to struggle. Breathe.
What fascinates me about this book is how poets, writers, performers, visual artists, videographers, directors, musicians, and others come together to share their stories of creativity and self-destruciton. I hope you are reading the bios at the end of each chapter--these are amazing individuals. And many of them are performers. Performance seems to be lacking in our daily lives as artists and teachers and for many of these writers, performance is absolutely necessary to their existence. Is anyone noticing a difference in terms of what we are reading here as opposed to our first book? Does it seem different? Many of these women use performance in their art. If there is a difference in writing, can you put some fingers on it. How do these women write differently? As they write on the margins, how marginal are their lives? Do we know folks battling similar issues? Using art or performance? How did you relate to Nicole Blackman's story? Dive, Alice, Drive... What did you think of her mentoring? Elizabeth Stephens and Annie Sprinkle delve into cancer and performance. What draws you into their stories?
ReplyDeleteIt is interesting..my husband and I are painters; our four boys are: A poet/Lecturer/painter/Lecturer/musician/Lecturer/clinical psychologist/Lecturer....when we all get together..well it reminds me of your post above...stories of creativity and definitely self destruction...hmmmm just a thought
DeleteLast week catch up post:
DeleteAfter reading others' posts I found that the topic of grieving was highly discussed. I think it was David Harmon who said that in our (American or Western) culture, we do not spend much time in grievance. Just less than two weeks ago, a co-worker if mine's mother passed away. She was 96. It was very hard on my friend/co-worker, yet she only took a week off of work. I could not believe how soon she was able to return to work. I feel like I would have been useless. She told me that it helped take her mind off of things though. I can see both sides. Music and art are definitely therapeutic and Zack shared that with us. Many of my friends are musicians and all have a story to why they sing or play music. It is healing. The same goes with some of us and visual arts. Candie pointed out that we all have natural coping mechanisms and some that are learned or adapted. Coming from a toxic family, I began to develop OCD behaviors along with anxiety. Someone else shared that as well. Zach, it wasn't until my adult ages that I learned what an addiction really was and how it impacts the family unit as a whole. Addiction runs fluent in my family and it took years to accept what had really happened as a child. Funny how us artists seem to have so many great stories of resiliency…
I found the Nicole Blackman section extremely moving. Her poem was vivid and disturbing, but as I read it, and my knee-jerk reactions died away, I began to sense a meditative state developing within the lines. I can hardly imagine dealing with such an unexpected responsibility arising directly from another person's experiencing of my art. In a way, I think this is a validation of the artwork's relevance and would be a major affirmation for the artist. However, such a reaction would make artistic creation a weighty, stressful enterprise. As an educator, I have experienced a similar, albeit less dramatic, sensation. My daily interactions are with very impressionable, vulnerable, and often, struggling youth. Sometimes I have a bit of insight into their personal situations, but I know that for the majority, I will never fully understand their individual needs. I keep this truth close to my heart and work to make my interactions with students positive and receptive. I hope to make a beneficial impact on both their academic and personal growth. Their voices can be very quiet, even when they are at their loudest- playing, laughing, screaming, griping, taunting and even self-loathing. To stay grounded, I try and focus on the times I do hear them, and not linger on the calls I've missed. I often tell students to not get “stuck in the mud” and “keep moving forward”... I do think it is important for us to keep driving.
Delete(Week 7) I appreciate the installation art by Steiner and Lenzlinger. I feel that they give a unique look at the environmental problems that face different parts of the world. I agree with Candie. Why is it not mandatory to recycle? When I lived in South Korea it was mandatory to recycle. I lived on the 13th floor of a 17 floor building. I would take our trash down to the parking lot where they would have recycled bins set up. You would sort everything and put it in the right bin. If you did not know where to put it there was someone there to help and if it was a large item like furniture you would set it off to the side and if someone wanted it they could take it. If no one wanted it a truck would come the next day to collect it. I found it fascinating that you recycled everything. I had to recycle food scraps, egg shells, left overs that were not eaten. They had to be dehydrated in a machine and put in a plastic bin. I think the U. S. could acquire some better recycling practices.
DeleteWhat drew me into Stephens and Sprinkle’s stories is the way that they dealt with cancer. You could feel the positive energy in their performances and the words. I personally have not had to deal with the effects of cancer but, I have seen how it affects others. I was also drawn to how human their worries were. Is she going to leave me?…am I going to die?…is she going to die?...I have to be strong?….why couldn’t it be me?…what doctor should we go with? Also the strength in both women. How Beth cared for her lover and her best friend. Beth and Annie didn’t let cancer rule them. I feel that every performance was a fuck you to cancer. But is also generated a great amount of positive energy within all the turmoil, fear, and worry.
Delete(week 8) Pain makes for an interesting read for we are drawn to it like a bird with a broken wing. I am drawn to the artist, Van Gogh and his struggle. I have read just about everything out there concerning the artist including the 1000 page book detailing the new discovery of his death. What he writes to his brother Theo is painstakingly raw and heartfelt. I am sure writing, for Van Gogh, was a balm to the lonesomeness and hurt he felt throughout his life. He himself was drawn to other people’s struggles. How different Vincent’s art might look like if he was medicated with modern medicine. Daphne Gottlieb worried she may not be able to access that deep place if she was medicated. What if we medicated Poe? Pollock, Miro, Rothko, Hemingway? Would we have the incredible works we have today if medicine was available to these great artists/writers?
Delete(week 8) Writers writing about pain, does pain create better art/writings? The children’s movie, Inside Out, reminds us we all have happy, sad, angry, and even fear. But why can’t happy move us like the rest can? I feel some of the greatest works of art and writings come from a place of sadness, fear, revolt, anger, and self- destruction just as much as it comes from a place of discovery, laughter, joy, and freedom. I am extremely moved by everyone of the stories. After the last word is read from each selection, I just sit there, absorbing and processing. Honestly, not one word comes to mind to write about. My mind is still in the story. Like a drug, it takes me a day to come down then I start thinking about how it relates to my life as a person, as a teacher, as a parent, and as an artist.
DeleteBlackman's poem, Holy, really was well written. It's crazy to me that she could write such detail and have such a connection to something that she wasn't going through herself. I can see where it would convince some of her followers. I think that must have been such a huge burden for her to carry- answering all of those e-mails in hopes of not giving bad advice. I suppose the women suffering through these issues had huge burdens themselves, though. I think it is great that she was able to study their behaviors enough to help Alice. I was touched by the support she offered her. It's interesting to think of self-destruction as an act of control. It's funny how our brains work- esp after traumas.
DeleteStephens and Sprinkle- what a great approach to take. They seemed to have made a game out of this cancer tragedy. The mind is an amazing thing- the playful, upbeat roles they took on helped, I believe, them to get through this much faster and easier. Your mental health really can help or hurt your physical health, I believe. One line I love from this is, "Sharing honestly about our lives really helps us all." I think the emphasis if on the "honestly" part. It's easy to make marketable works that are pretty and don't rock any boats. The nitty gritty, real things that we encounter are more interesting. They are strong, I belive, because we can all relate to the tough stuff and heartache.
DeleteMy project is going to be an environmetal performance piece. It will be a positive coming together of of women artists. I hadn't thought of it til now but Nicole Blackman's poem, HOLY, could be a written performance piece. It was full of motion from beginning to end. I've ever understood the powerful feeling of having control over one's body until I read SHES LOST CONTROL AGAIN.
DeleteThe Nicole Blackman piece was really powerful. It really makes you understand the gravity of a situation and the impact that our own art can have on other people. I feel like I have always been somewhat of a selfish artist. I do art for other people sometimes, but it is usually as a gift or a commission piece. People have come and asked me to do something that will have meaning to them our just look good hanging in their house. However, I have never done something like Blackman where I have have imagined myself in the shoes of someone dealing with an issue or a disease and created a narrative around it. That in itself takes time and guts. But then, she went even further and accepted the responsibility for what she had created. Her art took on new life and went viral in several directions, some of which appalled her. I was impressed that she stuck with it and found myself wondering if I would do the same. As artists of any kind, I believe it is important for us to take responsibility for our actions. It you put it out there, you should be prepared to back it up and support it. With the way social media has taken off, I have seen an irresponsible recklessness. People say and do things all the time without regard to their impact or consequences. Maybe comparing the two is far fetched, but it certainly makes you think about how you have impacted others with your own work.
DeleteThis was one of the photo series I was thinking of when reading Double Trouble in the Love Art Lab:
DeleteHere you can find "The Battle We Didn't Choose"
Mywifesfightwithbreastcancer.com
The photographs that are most remarkable to me are the one where she and her husband are smiling together, the one where she is holding a few strands of hair, the one where her bald head is lying on her mother's shoulder, and of course the empty bed at the end of the series.
One of the others I'm thinking of is:
"The Scar Project."
http://www.thescarproject.org/gallery
Some of the photographs of nude women baring their scars from their mastectomies are really beautiful and moving, in my opinion.
To me, these types of things are different from was going on in the Love Art Lab. Instead of documenting or showing a truth, they staged these weird, fetish-y scenarios in an attempt to "eroticize everything." At one point the author states that it is in fact their goal to eroticize everything. To me, that takes away from what is in my opinion the special nature of things like sex, the relationship between a husband and wife, the identity of a woman etc. In my opinion, the "The Battle We Didn't Choose," or The Scar Project are more truthful, respectful, powerful and heart wrenching. Some of what was presented in the Love Art Lab almost seems opportunistic and cheap to me.
I can still remember seeing my grandmother's scars as a very young boy. It fascinated all of us grandchildren when we were 3 and 4 years old. We thought it was like getting your hand cut off! A battle wound. But to my Nana, it was no big deal. She loved life (and still does over 30 years later) and just said "get rid of it." I have always admired the strength of my grandmother to make that decision, and many others. So much so, we named our youngest child Lola, in her honor, because she is the strongest woman I know. I love to share my grandmother's story with others who have battled breast cancer or who currently are.
(Exit soapbox)
(week8)Back in the early 80’s, I had a best friend and we were like sisters. We could not have been more opposite people but somehow our souls connected and we are still linked to this day. We would write notes to each other (the original texting ..lol) folding the paper into that origami shape that restaurants use today to hold crayons and the kids menu. Our daily writing grew to a spiral bound notebook that we shared. We changed our names to symbols from the Hello Kitty family: heart and star. This kept our names anonymous plus it kind of represented our personalities very well. (Many years later, I created a painting of a heart and start that won best in show in an art show) I can’t tell you how many spirals we acquired, like volumes of books, and I can’t begin to tell you all the things we talked about- She and I were prolific writers. Wrote about boys, girls, dreams, our moms, school, but rather interestingly, we wrote about books we read. We were HUGE readers and I am not talking Nancy Drew series. We were reading Anne Rice, Anais Nin, and Hemingway in High School.
DeleteLater, I spent my days and nights in the art building at college, and she in graphic design school in Arizona. We began mailing manila envelopes full of our journaling to each other. They were like thick documents from an important Law office. We would tear out magazine pages from cool art periodicals, vogue anything that we felt interesting, we shared with each other. We would send each other drawings and drafts of our drawings, asking each other what should we add or tweak.
Then life turns.
Marriages, babies, careers.. the writing became few and far between. Emails started but were still brief. Texting, even briefer. I miss that girl and the soul pouring we put onto paper. She and I still have everything-all in crates collecting dust in both of our attics. I can’t write like that anymore. Wish to hell I still could.
Patricia Smith’s story was incredible. The writing.. oh the writing. Secretly, I am envious of good writers. Maybe because I am rusty and miss words very much. I was afraid of the damage of chemo on my brain. Chemo brain is real and scary. I was so afraid to lose my smarts that I never thought it would be my words. Agh. So, I work hard to rebuild my word bank. I did think of journaling my experience and actually created several entries but stopped the sicker I became. Counselors with the cancer center say to journal as a way to release feelings of fear, anger, hope… of the few pages I penned, I quickly destroyed. I did not want the power of those sickly words to linger. As I heal, my perspective is deeper creating within me some thoughts that I might be ready to reach back and write about my experience. Possibly James is right, writing during self-destruction or just plain destruction isn’t productive ??
As my project I would like to revisit a previous project in undergrad called trash to treasure. Possibly somehow tying in my journey with breast cancer. Not sure how I want to represent this in an art form but for now still thinking...
DeletePart of artmaking is bringing out the passion or pain that is living inside you. The past two books have definitely helped bring those passions to the surface. I am unquestionably a better teacher, artist, and person from experiencing these books.
One more and then I am through for the night. Chase, thank you for your post. It was quite honorable of you to get on your soapbox- to be transparent and defending of such a harrowing ordeal, I thank you. A parent at my school wanted to do something for me upon hearing of my diagnosis. She is a photographer so naturally she wanted to offer her services free of charge. She photographed me and my children before I lost all of my hair. She also talked me into a session about photographing my body after cancer and surgeries. They are private to me and I almost do not recognize the woman in the pictures. We will have another session this spring celebrating my new hair, health, and life. What a gift she gave.
DeletePot marker.
DeleteMusician and filmmaker Silas Howard describes her story. Her adventures. Her attempts to rise above poverty. Do you notice any similarities in your art or life? For them, "friendship was how to find yourself" (p. 127). I'm imagining that some of these stories may seem harsh and yet as I re-read through them, I am captivated with honest recollections of adversity and self-discovery. Rappin' My Wounds...Toni Blackman. Hip Hop artist. Wise words? Things we can only learn through lived experience? Have you known anyone who was "red bone evil" (p. 131)? She writes about scars from childhood that we all hold. "He is your lesson" (p. 138). Who was your lesson?
ReplyDeleteFriendship has been an important aspect of survival for me since Kindergarten. Before then, I was mostly isolated and really only spent any significant amount of time with my family. My very first friend left partway through Kindergarten due to illness. In first grade, I never really made a friend. I did have a crush, I made her a bead necklace, but nothing happened there (ha, ha) for another nine years... Second grade wasn't much different, except I failed, so, any acquaintances were then gone. I started my second, second grad with zero friends. I fought a lot, anybody. I was pretty good at coloring though, my teacher said so. In the third grade, I made my best friend. He was new to our school. I think I kinda adopted him. We were both a little different from the hometown crowd, so there was an immediate connection. I became his self professed bodyguard. We added friends as the years went by, some mutual, some exclusive. By high school, I had several good friends. We were all different from the norm and all underwent differing degrees of harassment. We did fine, until the school board and greater community decided to join in on the fun. None of us did fine for years after that. Of my eight closest friends, all top twenty percent class standing at least, only three actually finished high school. I would not have made it through my teenage years without my friends, not in one piece. I would have self destructed and probably made sure the ship went down with me. In college, we lived, partied and fought together. In the freedom of young adulthood, we became our worst enemies. That is when I learned that I would never “find” myself in my relationships with friends. It was too easy to fit in and get lost in the communal atmosphere. I was a patriot and protector, not a leader. I knew that If I ever really wanted to find my self and my voice, I would have to distance myself from my close friends and stake claim to the peculiarities that make me, me. I branched out in all areas of my life, art, music, relationships, hobbies, etc. At some point we all did. There were some rocky times, and a few fell from the pack. Today my best childhood friends, there are four of us, are still very close and quite similar in attitudes, beliefs and preferences, but we have had our own journeys and cherish our individual scars like badges of honor, and stupidity... I mean wisdom. *during the writing of this, I got a text from my third grade friend and after 36 years, this makes me smile.
DeleteI think this is one of my favorite writings from this book. Howard says that “art was a simple act of survival and survival was an art form for us.” When I was in my pre-teens, street survival was what was important. There were gangs, violence, drugs, you name it- it was at my front door. Once my father was locked away (for drugs) and we had to move from our middle class house to our lower class apartment, survival mode kicked in for me. I would often “ignore the chaos” as Howard puts it and just keep pushing through the days. Stealing was normal. I can admit that now. I can come clean on everything now, but trust me, I'm not proud of anything I did back then. We stole food to eat. We did not have money to buy from the grocery store. I apologize to Tom Thumb for all of the food we stole, but we had to eat. It feels great not to have to steal groceries anymore. Once my little brother got caught stealing a Lunchable from the store. Not a toy, not gum or candy, just food to fill his belly. When school was about to start, there was no back-to-school shopping. It was back-to-school-shoplifting. I estimate I have stolen over thousands of dollars of merchandise. I became an expert. A 14 year old shop-lifting expert. I could steal anything. We didn't have any other resources, our mother wasn't around either. One of the things I ALWAYS had was art. That was the one constant. I moved about 10 times in high school. 3 different schools, 3 different family members. It was almost like nobody wanted me but art. Art was always there. I look back and realize that maybe art is what eventually kept me out of the most trouble. Most of my friends from back home are either dead or locked up. Maybe keeping my nose in my sketchbook helped prevent me from going down one of those roads.
DeleteYour honesty and forthright dealing with this negative time in your life is hugely inspiring. You did it! You made it through! Thank you for this brutally honest sharing.
Delete"Rappin' My Wounds" by Toni Blackman was my favorite story. I highlighted so many lines that it is all a yellow blur. I think we can all relate to harmful relationships and I don't just mean between a man and a woman. These harmful relationships can take many forms. When we are in the mist of these relationships we know the smart thing to do is to get out, but, so many feelings get in the way.
DeleteToni Blackman, in my opinion, does a beautiful job in taking you through the story with her rappin'.
Although I cannot relate to the drug addiction, I did find some common ground with the Silas story. I was an only child coming from a poor family. I didn't realize how poor we were until I stayed the night with some friends from middle school. It was, looking back now, a middle class home, but to me they were so rich. She had dinner at a certain time, had a clean house without cockroaches, and had parents helping her to study rather than teach her how to roll joints. My parents weren't bad though- just misguided. They never struck me or mistreated me in that way, but there was unintentional neglect. You don't think about it at the time, but you do survive. It seemed so much easier for my middle class friend. It killed me because she didn't even know how easy she had it.
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DeleteI’ve learned a lot about friendships in the last 5 years. One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned is about the type of friendships I want to cultivate. Mine came in the form of a friend who was very emotionally needy. In her eyes if you didn’t keep constant contact with her you weren’t here friend. I am the type of person that if I don’t have anything to say I tend to keep quiet. I only communicate when I have things to say or make plans to do something. It wasn’t until she left my life that I found out just how destructive her words and actions had been, she not only affected my life but poisoned many people around me. Myself and the others she affected were finally able to see how destructive she had been. She was the type of person that constantly made you choose between her and any other friends. In one instance she knew another friend was going to throw a party and decided to throw her own party that same night. She would say things like “I know you’re my real friend if you come to my party.” If you made her mad she would give you the silent treatment. We all finally learned to just act like nothing was wrong and talk to her or around her as if there wasn’t an elephant in the room. It takes more energy to stay mad at someone, than it does to forgive them. The good thing was that once she left many of our lives we were able to rebuild our friendships. It just made me realize that those types of people can make it really hard when it comes to trusting people. You become afraid to build friendships with people because you always question their words and actions.
DeletePost marker.
DeletediMassa...Artful Ways of Surviving. How do we use them in our lives, art or teaching? Weight Watcher. Stephanie Howell. Reading her life by weight subtitles. I'd like for you to google or youtube Marilyn Wann, wrote the book Fat!So! She is a fat activist. See if you can see images of her Yay! scale. If not, I can post a few photos of a former student who bought a Yay! scale and did a performance years ago for a Genderland one-night exhibition at the Ice House at LHUCA in Lubbock. Do Howell's stories ring true to you? Do you have your own versions? Howell embraced performance. Can we ever embrace it as a medium?
ReplyDeleteI was reading this on the way to work this morning (Monday 2016. 10. 31) and listening to The Piano Guys’ song Uncharted. I almost broke down at the part when Howell talked about having to weight herself in front of the class. It brought back all the feelings I had in PE on fitness challenge day. I remember having to step on the scale and then do all the fitness challenges and just the sense of dread that I had every year. The lucky thing was that our teachers never said our weight out loud. I have struggled with my weight ever sense I moved to the Texas from Belize. I don’t think I was ever teased for being fat as Howell was but, I was always made conscious of it mainly by family members or by events in PE class. I was never morbidly obese, just husky for my age. I have a beer belly without drinking beer.
DeleteHere in Beijing people can be very direct about your weight. It’s a good thing that I am very thick skinned. Because here people will constantly mention or comment on your weight when they ask you about food plans. I remember one of our course consultants at work one day asking me If I had had lunch yet. I told him no and he said, “maybe you should order a salad.” He’s luck that I was taken back because I was about to go all sassy bitch queen on him. I did shrug it off, but it’s things like that that still make me uncomfortable with my weight even today. I would really like to have a flatter belly. To this day I wish that I could be taller than my five foot seven inches, so that I could have my weight distributed more evenly or gain weight all over instead of carrying most of it in my stomach (also so that I have to stop having pants tailored). I am not someone who is drawn to destructive behavior or extremes. I don’t starve myself or not eat. I just don’t make the right choices when it comes to food. I know that I have an unhealthy relationship with food. When you ask me if I want eat healthy or grab a pizza, it’s going to be pizza every time . I am slowly working towards a better relationship with food, exercise, and better self-image.
I can't say that I've every really used art as a direct survival method. I do use art as a way of relaxing and finding peace in my life. I suppose that is a facet of survival. I know that being creative is an integral component of my personality and if it was forbade in some way, I would be a very different person. I think art allows me to accept the things and people in my life that are... adverse to my natural flow. I think that without creative expression, I would be a more aggressive and less forgiving person.
DeleteIn teaching, I see a good deal of students who seem to benefit from making art. Some students who are very active and confrontational can be calm and collaborative during art making. This year I'm trying to stress for my students to strive for 'the zone'. I want them to reach a creative focus that will enrich their minds and abilities. Of course, servicing such a diverse population, this can be a lofty goal at times.
James-Who would want a daily life that was void of something relaxing or peaceful? Art can bring us to a place of peace. I love the idea of "the zone" you are trying to convey to your students. I've found myself saying "get into your zone and ignore all of the day's distractions". I also let students listen to music while they work. It seems to help. I wanted to make this post while it was fresh on my mind because with my last Art class of the day, we have a spontaneous conversation about making art outside of the classroom. One student told me that when she's angry she likes to make art. Another expressed that when she felt down or sad she liked to draw. Just hearing those words meant everything to me, because as a teacher I know that most of them are just enrolled in my class for the fine arts credit the State of Texas requires them to have for graduation, so to see them value art in that way was awesome. Sounds corny, but it really was a great moment. These are kids who are labeled "bad" and give other teachers hell. But in art they are at peace. They feel comfortable and not threatened. At the end of the school year, who cares about grades, art competitions, awards/recognitions.....to me it is about student growth and awareness through art. Now my principal and others may not agree, but I don't care. They are not in my classroom day to day. They do not know my students.
DeleteAs far as embracing performance, I think I'm just now getting comfortable with that idea. Performance art was so foreign to me until this course. I see it as being a perfect medium for some of my ideas. Also maybe even bringing it into a lesson with my upper level art classes.
James- I agree with you about art being calming. I find that for myself and for my students, it is sort of a meditative thing. I find it amazing when there is a hush in the classroom (it doesn't happen all the time, mind you!) and I realize they're all so in the zone. That moment when you snap out of it because you didn't realize what time it was. How awesome to have all that stress, whatever was constantly poking at your brain, just hush during that meditation. It's hard for me to turn off sometimes- I just keep going and going because I feel I have a million things to do in only 24 hours. Concentrating on a piece of my art forces me to calm down without me even realizing it. I think that focus is a great thing for our students to experience and enjoy.
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DeleteAnd questions, comments, advice, updates about projects. Remember, at some point you will need to post the address of where we can look at your progress on your project (or not if it's secret/private). Don't post those now. I will post a sidebar where everyone can post address--not yet. That's in a three weeks or so. I will also post a page on here where you can leave comments about other's projects as well. That's also in three weeks or so.
ReplyDeleteThe garden pictures brought up some fond memories for me. I had a great aunt who would decorate her tree limbs with colored bottles. I don't really remember her, but I do remember being at her house, which was very eclectic, which to a small, visually oriented kid was cool. My mother said that her aunt was quite a strong character and that she was very crafty. My mother looked up to her aunt as someone who used the little that they had to make their daily life better. She would re-purpose ordinary items by making them into various styled containers, decorated boxes, planters and the like. She also quilted and used re-purposed fabrics to decorate her home. Last year I started offering a Collage zone for my students. It includes some used 'disposable' items such as boxes, paper scraps, left over ribbons, lid, etc. This week, I'm starting a new lesson that focuses on students bringing interesting used items to include into a kinetic sculpture project. The items will need to be leftover things that they would normally be recycled (hopefully) or trashed. I'm very curious at how my students will react to this assignment. I expect that some will think that it is gross, but that others, hopefully most, will find it challenging and empowering.
DeleteCan I use the current project I'm doing with my students? The trash collection/art mission? I have been making some items out of what we are finding and I have been loving it. Would you rather I come up with something new instead?
DeleteI was really wanting to do this this social project with my students that I talked about in our first post. It is inter-generational project where a select group of students with go spend time in a local assisted living facility for a semester and then produce art/ knowledge from their time spent there. Semester is about over, so that is looking more like a spring project.
ReplyDeleteThere a local coffee shop that just opened in town that contacted me over the summer to do a mural for their wall. I am working it out so the students will paint it. The coffee shop is called Corporal Ray's Coffee, named after their son who passed in Afghanistan. Would this be a suitable project? I could certainly do one of my own projects, but thought one of these would be more fun to share with the class. I am designing it and they will do they painting. Let me know your thoughts. Thanks.
I think that while you are designing it maybe you should ask for the students' input or opinions. It will allow you to get some critique in a sense and it will also make them feel more a part of the project. Overall it sounds great! Does the coffee shop have an idea on mind or are they giving you free choice?
DeleteThe only requirements are that their son is on the painting somewhere. When I asked what they were looking for she asked me to pray about it and that they would trust in that. I have put a lot of thought into this, trying to stay away from cliche patriotic/ soldier art. I have also tried to do something representative of their son and at the same time be a blessing to the community. I have an idea that I ran by the other art teach, who has been teaching in Aledo for 35 years. She really liked my idea and talked through it with me to add her own perspective. I took the reference photos for the background. A student borrowed my camera and changed the white balance setting, so all my pics are bright blue, but i'll post them anyways.
DeleteSounds wonderful!
ReplyDeleteMy project is an art and anthropology project.When in NYC at an art and Humanities conference, a couple of weeks ago,I visited the Holocaust museum and I read a story about a man named Leo Frank.Leo Frank
ReplyDelete"Leo Max Frank was an American factory superintendent who was convicted in 1913 of the murder of a 13-year-old employee, Mary Phagan, in Atlanta, Georgia. Wikipedia
Born: April 17, 1884, Cuero, TX
Died: August 17, 1915, Marietta, GA
Buried: Mount Carmel Cemetery
Spouse: Lucille Selig (m. 1910–1915)
Residence: Atlanta, GA
Education: Cornell University, Pratt Institute"
He was innocent and this was first and last time there was a lynching of a white Jewish
man.It was horrific but what may have been worse as that there was 350 lynchings of African Americans in the same place that year and only reported in small type at the back of the newspaper.My art is informed by the song"Strange fruit"which is sung first by Billie Holiday and then by Nina Simone,they call the men hanging from the poplar trees "Strange Fruit"I will post the song informed by the poem above.I typically choose my projects based on that feeling which the poet, Robert frost said gives him "that lump in my throat"and this project embraces that attitude .
When I was reading about Stephanie Howell I had the thought of doing a self-portrait. I saw myself standing in front of a full length mirror and drawing the image of myself as I invasion myself to be. Also maybe doing another one as if the image in the mirror is looking out from inside the mirror.
ReplyDeleteI'am still looking at doing a recording of friends on the effects that the pollution has on them.
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